subreddit:

/r/AskMen

183

Men of Reddit what’s your view on Gentleman’s clubs?

(self.AskMen)

[deleted]

all 284 comments

ChosenSCIM

713 points

1 month ago

ChosenSCIM

What is a man?

713 points

1 month ago

Are we talking about a traditional gentleman's club as in men sitting around a fireplace in fancy chairs wearing fancy clothes drinking whisky and smoking cigars or do you mean the modern American euphemism for a titty bar?

Either way they aren't my scene.

Current_Poster

219 points

1 month ago

I always thought I'd look good with a monocle...

RolandParr57

146 points

1 month ago

Naw, you'd just make a spectacle of yourself...!

QuentinTarzantino

25 points

1 month ago

I c what u did there.

[deleted]

3 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

3 points

1 month ago

C? Not "see"? You woulda caught if you weren't so myopic

DocHickory

4 points

1 month ago

Nothing but net, baybeeee!

0xDEADBEAD

43 points

1 month ago

Is the former actually a thing where I can just find one of these places, walk in, and relax with a cigar with random stranger dudes?

zillafreak

48 points

1 month ago

Usually you have to be accepted into them and be a member, not strangers off the street.

future_things

28 points

1 month ago

I’m gonna go start my own gentlemen’s club with whiskey and cigars and pool tables, and everyone is welcome as long as they’re willing to play the role of Fancy Bookcase Gold Club Dad.

See y’all there!

emponator

7 points

1 month ago

Maybe that is how the strip club variety came to be actually.

Bender going to start a gentleman's club of his own, with blackjack and hookers?

Numerobofis

3 points

1 month ago

With blackjack and hookers

CaramelChewies

6 points

1 month ago

So... a Freemason lodge with better amenities?

CleverNameTheSecond

3 points

1 month ago

Not always. A lot of cities have clubs that you pay a membership fee for, but you don't necessarily need to "be accepted in", maybe just pass an interview process to make sure you fit the bill as a patron. However once you're in you get access to all the fancy amenities.

frozenrope22

8 points

1 month ago

Cigar bars are a thing

Western-Cartoonist-1

2 points

1 month ago

macanudo cigar bar nyc...it the bomb diggity

Scott_Sanchez

1 points

1 month ago

It's called a cigar lounge, and they're pretty awesome.

cant_think_name_22

5 points

1 month ago

Cozying up by a fire with a book sounds sooo nice. I would love to do that dude.

It’s marked as nsfw, and the nsfw meaning I ain’t interested in

wellthatexplainsalot

19 points

1 month ago

Clubs can be nice. And should accept anyone, regardless without any discrimination.

Strip bars are creepy.

seeyalaterskater01

259 points

1 month ago

Strip clubs you mean? I just want to make sure I get what you're meaning.

I don't really like em, I've been to gay ones and I've been to straight ones, both suck for different reasons. The idea of it is much more enticing than the reality.

grandboyman

198 points

1 month ago

I don't really like the idea. Its like prostitution but you get less value for money

[deleted]

130 points

1 month ago*

[deleted]

130 points

1 month ago*

[deleted]

ChloePrice4Life

31 points

1 month ago

That's the only way I'd get my money's worth.. have her strip for like 55 minutes first.

knowitallz

5 points

1 month ago

Such a fucking tease

ThisIsFlight

25 points

1 month ago

Why would I go pay to get a boner in public when I can get a boner at home for free?

savageinthebox

23 points

1 month ago

This is the best answer (not the part about gay ones that’s whatever) but the idea of strip clubs is way better than the reality.

reddit_toast_bot

3 points

1 month ago

TIDDAYS

TryEasySlice

5 points

1 month ago

What’s distinctly different about a gay strip club besides the gender of the workers?

seeyalaterskater01

56 points

1 month ago

Well your clientele at a gay strip club is about 80 percent straight women to 20 percent gay men.

Nothing inherently wrong with that but most of the women are there for a bachelorette party and they are the worst, they are bombed before they even get to the joint, they think they are the only people in the building and they treat the performers like shit, 10 times worse then the shit you see at a strip club with female performers.

Tundur

19 points

1 month ago

Tundur

19 points

1 month ago

If 80% of your clientele are straight women, I think that's just a straight strip club with a cordoned off section for gay dudes.

seeyalaterskater01

8 points

1 month ago

Good point.

DrunkDMTip

153 points

1 month ago

DrunkDMTip

153 points

1 month ago

It’s a waste of money to get an erection you can’t do anything with, and if you happen to know a club that will let you do something about that hard-on, you shouldn’t trust anything that goes on in there.

I’m convinced that upstanding gentlemen’s clubs exist only because young men are idiots, and on occasion it’s fun to be stupid for one night when you’re buddy’s getting married next week.

It’s been ten years since I’ve been in one, and I remember walking out thinking “that wasn’t even fun drunk.”

urmoms_ahoe

50 points

1 month ago

I know a guy whose about 20 years old. A new club opened in town, so he went to check it out.

He spent $1500 there in one weekend.

DrunkDMTip

74 points

1 month ago

That man, and men like him, are the reason the industry thrives.

grandboyman

27 points

1 month ago

Some guys have such a low self esteem that the only way they get compliments from ladies is by paying for it

Kamilny

10 points

1 month ago

Kamilny

10 points

1 month ago

I mean that's not low self esteem. It causes it.

awsamation

20 points

1 month ago

awsamation

Male

20 points

1 month ago

No the low self esteem definitely comes first, then the vicious cycle starts.

kevlarcardhouse

32 points

1 month ago

kevlarcardhouse

Male

32 points

1 month ago

That's exactly why I went once with others, had a bad time, and have no desire to ever go to one again. The money you spend at a strip club never seems worth it.

  • If I want to look at naked women, I can do that online for free and not have to think about how greasy the establishment is and how annoying some of the other men are.
  • If I want to ogle dancing scantily clad women who I don't get to have sex with, I can go to a club for the price of a beer.
  • For not much more than the amount I would spend for the entry fee, the 2 drink minimum, and the lap dance, I'm pretty sure I could at the very least get an actual hand job somewhere in the city if I'm that horny and desperate.

Hey, if you make money stripping or you like going to a strip club, all the power to you. But like a casino, the appeal for me runs it's course once my first 20 bucks are gone.

Tarmacked

59 points

1 month ago

It's basically a bunch of dudes paying to get erections next to each other.

Wessssss21

11 points

1 month ago

This exactly.

If I can't at least jerk off, what's the point. To see some live tits I can't do anything with while being nickel and dimed by the club?

gummibear049

111 points

1 month ago

Not mine, but copy/paste from a response in an askmen thread from a few years ago.

Most of us guys aren't that physically attractive. We also aren't rich or famous or powerful. We're basically nobody's. There isn't anything wrong with that, it's just life. I'm just an average guy. Like most guys I spent all of my pre-marriage life focused on meeting girls.

"Work out - chicks like buff dudes"

"Dress better - chicks like that"

"Don't dance like that - you look stupid"

"Be confident"

"Talk more, be funny!"

"Don't talk so much"

"Be direct"

"Don't be a creep!"

"Buy her gifts, girls like gifts!"

"Neg her - insult her a bit and she'll like you!"

"Why don't you have a girlfriend?"

etc...etc...etc...

From junior high until I met my wife, there was this non-stop pressure to be meeting women. Even when I had a girlfriend, my social circle didn't. In college we were going out to bars, going to clubs, throwing parties, all because we wanted to meet girls. And while I did meet girls, as an average guy, it was hard. Girls weren't lining up to talk to me.

Going to a strip club was a glimpse of another world for a guy like me. Maybe it's a fictional world, I don't know. I'll never be rich, famous or attractive...but that's how I imagine life would be like for them. A world where I could go into a club and the hot waitress wouldn't just take my order, but flirt and put her hand on my shoulder. Stuff like that would never happen in 'real life' for me. No, I'd awkwardly try to get to know her, or buy her a drink or whatever and maybe after months of trying, one waitress would actually want to date me. At the strip club though? It's like I'm rich and famous and attractive.

Then you look at the stage and there is this amazing girl. The kind of girl that wouldn't look twice at me. The kind of girl that; even when my friends were drunk, wouldn't encourage me to hit on, because even THEY KNEW I didn't have a shot. The most physically desirable girls I've ever seen - aren't just hanging out at the club - but they're dancing. Sexily. And unlike a real club where even my staring at them from across the room is seen as inappropriate, these girls welcome it. And then they TAKE OFF THEIR CLOTHES! When the get off the stage, they come around and mingle. They come up TO ME and try to flirt WITH ME. Most guys like myself, we've never had any girl approach us and try to hit on us. And if we have, it's always girls we're not interested in. Never a socially desirable woman. And they are actively trying to get me, to CHOOSE THEM, to go in the back and get a private dance with.

It's a complete reversal of everything I dealt with in junior high/high school and college. I can walk into a strip club and feel like I'm somebody amazing that amazingly hot, amazingly fit, young women actually want. It's a great feeling, even if it's not genuine.

It's like any other service you purchase. You're paying money for an enjoyable time (and it is very enjoyable).

My wife and I enjoy traveling. We'll stay at fancy hotels. It's the same idea. We have an average sorta house; but for 4-5 days every year or two, we can pretend we're rich. We go to a fancy resort and pretend we live on the ocean and that we have a butler and a maid and fancy furniture and all that. The staff is super nice, but not because they like us. It's their job. It's a glimpse at what life would be like if we were rich, and lived in a mansion on the ocean. It feels good and then we leave and think back to the memories.

Other people get massages....those people don't actually want to touch you. You pay them. It feels good. You leave with nothing. Same idea.

ShakaAndTheWalls

14 points

1 month ago

ShakaAndTheWalls

Apache Attack Helicopter

14 points

1 month ago

Nice comment. Probably should link to the original as well

AkiAkane1973

4 points

1 month ago

That... explains a lot.

I went to a strip club once and I didn't really like it, and I totally got it into my head that it was kind of a complete waste, but I would totally go again with that mindset.

It's nice being desired even if it's fake (as long as everyone knows it's fake).

It's why I was always happy to stop a d chitchat with girls giving away fliers and the like. They're trying to get my attention, which is a rare rare occurrence. Plus they're always super friendly and it makes for a nice interaction.

Thanks for posting this, I'm definitely saving it as a reminder on perspective.

MeLittleSKS

2 points

1 month ago

I mean, I think you nailed it. Yes it's fake. but that fake attention is still a nice taste. Your analogy to a regular middle class couple staying at a fancy resort is accurate.

ASJ_Tessimond

56 points

1 month ago

I'm a member of a rather well known traditional Gentlemen's Club in central London. Membership is certainly worthwhile. It's a nice (and calm) place to relax at on Saturday evening (pre-COVID). The bar is probably one of my favourite hideaways in the city. I've met many interesting people and made a few good friends through my membership.

If you're talking about Gentlemen's clubs in the euphemistic sense, then yes I have been to one once. It was during a friend's 21st birthday bash. I entered full of laddish confidence, got into a rather deep conversation with a woman who worked at the establishment then left feeling rather seedy, resolved never to set foot in such a place again.

tiezukae

15 points

1 month ago

tiezukae

15 points

1 month ago

Would be most disreputable indeed my good Sir!

reddit_toast_bot

2 points

1 month ago

Do you mean tiddays my good man

PPKA2757

158 points

1 month ago

PPKA2757

158 points

1 month ago

I’ve been to more than a few, albeit when I was younger as I haven’t been to one in a few years. Always viewed it as a fun “guys night out” thing, but it was never the “go-to” plan. Usually on a guys trip or something like that. Never went by myself, and it was never for a non-special event (re: trip to Vegas, bachelor party, group friend event, etc.).

They’re fun. The girls were usually nice (duh, you’re paying them to be), a few times some even hung out with my friends and I while we were there just to take a smoke break at our table (always made sure they knew we weren’t interested in a dance at the moment as to not waste their time).

If you’re going to a strip club to have fun with your friends and have a couple drinks, or perhaps a rite of passage sort of thing, there’s nothing wrong with it. If you’re going hoping for a sexual encounter or romantic connection, you’re going to have a bad time.

theclassicoversharer

87 points

1 month ago

Ex stripper here. This is the right attitude. Although depending on the club, some of the girls will totally have sex with you.

When I worked at a big (now closed) club in Memphis, there were around 75 girls on staff and a LARGE percentage of them were just sucking dicks right in plain view of the bouncers in the back. They also had a nightly show where two girls would go down on each other on stage and guys would throw money on top of them. They'd have to collect it in buckets at the end.

PPKA2757

39 points

1 month ago

PPKA2757

39 points

1 month ago

Oh for sure. I mean I’m not exactly innocent enough to think that doesn’t happen. Especially in some of the big clubs (or more often in the smaller market areas, the super sleazy ones).

But for a lonely dude that’s never had a girlfriend or is a virgin hoping this is his ticket to get laid, going to a strip club and thinking that the attention they’re giving is anything more than a transaction is not correct (or at least, 99% of the time, as I’m sure you can attest).

I have a few friends who are former dancers as well. Some of their stories are wild, others are sad (of the John’s, not themselves).

At the end of the day it’s a business like any other.

JAHNOOSKA

10 points

1 month ago

I donno, in my experience it was the smaller, seedier clubs that typically have more girls willing to get "hands on." They're also not usually as attractive, but that's the trade-off I guess.

The larger clubs were always more diligent about making sure the girls weren't doing that kind of stuff because it puts them at risk of being shut down.

Prolly depends on the city and how much the cops care, though.

Chatechized

6 points

1 month ago

Dang I just moved to Memphis! Gold Club and Purple Diamond got billboards everywhere but I just assumed they're all as boring as they seem.

Micahnotthatonebutme

174 points

1 month ago

I support working single moms

mexploder89

14 points

1 month ago

mexploder89

Male

14 points

1 month ago

I exhaled from my nose. Good job

massaBeard

22 points

1 month ago

For me, paying for affection or physical attention makes me not want it at all and essentially ruins it for me. Knowing that person is just in it for the money and doesn't actually care about me.

Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

6 points

1 month ago

Tend to agree. Having to deal with the possibility that you might be “that” guy- like, the “ugh, him? whatever, just do it for the money” guy... doesn’t sound all that fulfilling

Odd_Interaction_7419

43 points

1 month ago

American ones are pretty tame and way over priced.

theclassicoversharer

5 points

1 month ago

Are you Canadian?

Odd_Interaction_7419

11 points

1 month ago

I'm American, I've just done some traveling. Mostly in Asia.

mrrooroo1

17 points

1 month ago

Starting in my teens and all throughout my 20's, I lived at these places. I couldn't meet girls in real life. I was too insecure, depressed and a host of other things. This was my only interaction with girls. Early 40's now... fuck I hate them with a passion.

zinnia_cosmos

31 points

1 month ago*

I'm gay so take this with a grain of salt. I figure so long as the facility can enforce the safety and comfort of its employees, and so long as any performers are there consentually and compensated well for their time, what's the problem?

trapspeed3000

15 points

1 month ago

I'm a fan of titty bars, but just to play devil's advocate... they're super degrading and there's always an element of prostitution. At most of these places women crawl over and spread their pussy to put right in your face for one or two crumpled dollar bills. The real money comes from grinding on some stranger's dick (lap dance) but quite often skin on skin stuff.

zinnia_cosmos

12 points

1 month ago

Do you believe that women can consent to and be compensated appropriately for sex work?

trapspeed3000

10 points

1 month ago

I give exactly zero fucks what someone else does for money if it doesn't hurt others. I do look down on some types of work, but it's not my business to say whether someone can or can't do it.

PenguinJockey17

25 points

1 month ago

If we’re talking about strip clubs then it’s a pass from me. If I really want to see some ass I’ll try to get a girlfriend

skribsbb

10 points

1 month ago

skribsbb

10 points

1 month ago

I prefer that kind of entertainment in private.

dongballs613

10 points

1 month ago

A pointless waste of money.

NoideaLessinterest

9 points

1 month ago

The few I've been to have been shit. Cover charge to get in, overpriced drinks, moody customers, dancers that seem to not understand I don't want a lap dance at that moment and sometimes all I want to do, when I'm drunk enough to think that I want to go to a strip club, is just get a drink.

One club I went to, after I refused three different dancers wanting to give lap dances and was just sitting back and trying to enjoy my drink, the security guy told me I either had to take a girl for a dance or find another club. Absolutely zero interest in ever setting foot in another club like that for as long as I live.

StevenDangerSmith

17 points

1 month ago

Depressing.

DinkyIsLove

14 points

1 month ago

I wouldn't go to one I could afford.

But, if I were taken to a very upscale one, where the employees are very well compensated, and they are there because they want to be, then I would probably enjoy it.

gundealsgopnik

12 points

1 month ago

gundealsgopnik

Bane

12 points

1 month ago

I don't go to a restaurant to smell the food.
I don't go to strip clubs for the same reason.

Arguably I might if the performance was an advertisement for the real service being provided and it was done clean, above board, taxes paid, legal prostitution ... And my Wife cut me a hall pass. So right around February 31st.

My4thAlt

10 points

1 month ago

My4thAlt

10 points

1 month ago

Went in college a couple times since it was a thing to do. It felt the same as just seeing boobs on a computer screen.

Maybe when porn wasn't so readily available everywhere and people couldn't just reach in their pocket to see video of every fetish porn imaginable for any body type, look and position desired, strip clubs had their place. Now they're an outdated vice with people desensitized to everything the internet has to offer.

I imagine the only people who frequented them (pre-covid) are 50+ year old guys and college kids going for fun since they can.

uglybirddog

5 points

1 month ago

Youre spot on for the most part. The only thing ill add is the age is still pretty young. During the last oil boom strippers were making a killing. Up in North Dakota there isn't many girls to begin with then throw a boom that brought in so many guys that were starved for attention. The male to female ratio went from 3:1 to like 60:1. I knew girls that were on the "boomtown circuit' making 3-4k a night!

BusyLight32

3 points

1 month ago

I always imagined I would find them sleazy so I didn't go. When I a bunch of the guys went on a work outing and I pretty much had to go, I found them to be as sleazy as I had imagined.

ajarndaniel

4 points

1 month ago

Most uncomfortable and demeaning experience of my life. I didn’t know where we headed until I walked in and a bird fluttered out of someone’s vagina.

BoyThatsJustCraZ

15 points

1 month ago

It's derogatory, but as long as the patrons are respectful and it's all consensual, then I've got no problem with gentlemen's clubs

OLDGuy6060

-2 points

1 month ago

OLDGuy6060

-2 points

1 month ago

Problem is, the girls run on coke and barbiturates and their lives are uniformly bad, no matter how polite the customers might be.

And yeah, I know sone stripppers personally.

Strip clubs are sad, sad places.

cardholder01

16 points

1 month ago

That also describes working in a kitchen.

Ok-Carman-1992

16 points

1 month ago

If you are in a relationship you shouldn't be there. If you aren't, go if you don't mind blowing money

Rolten

6 points

1 month ago

Rolten

6 points

1 month ago

If you are in a relationship you shouldn't be there

What if your SO is fine with it?

Ok-Carman-1992

9 points

1 month ago

I'm not gonna condemn you for it.my belief is it does nothing to benefit a relationship

92taurusj

3 points

1 month ago

92taurusj

Male

3 points

1 month ago

What if your partner's fetish is watching you get a lap dance?

Ok-Carman-1992

9 points

1 month ago

I guess you do what you do. I always prefer to not introduce any unnecessary problems into a relationship

92taurusj

4 points

1 month ago

92taurusj

Male

4 points

1 month ago

In this hypothetical you'd be introducing unnecessary problems by not engaging their fetish, no?

CleverNameTheSecond

6 points

1 month ago

Far from gentlemanly and the patrons are far from gentlemen. It's always the greasy trashy folks who go in there, and 18-21 year olds because drinking age and boobies.

RandallJasper

3 points

1 month ago

I have no problem with them as long as everything is consensual. I don’t have an interest in spending money at one but I’m not gonna knock other people. I’ve only been to one once and my friends acted like they were exposing me to some wonderful new experience, I thought the place seemed kind of sad lol.

Cyanora

3 points

1 month ago

Cyanora

Male

3 points

1 month ago

I've been a handful of times. It's never really done much for me, but I don't really mind anyone partaking if that's their thing. My GF has actually expressed interest in heading out to one, so maybe things will change.

ToyDingo

3 points

1 month ago

Last time I was in one was years ago for my bachelor party. It was good time. Me and my buddies throwing back shots, getting drunk, chatting with the girls, eating wings, etc.

They are typically fun for a guys night out or a special occasion. But I can't see the appeal of it being your "hang out" place. Go there once every now and then for a buddies birthday or something.

I haven't been back to a gentlemen's club since my bachelor party. And I feel no need to.

I have no judgement on the ladies working there. As long as it's legal and they aren't being forced to do it, then so be it.

TrailingAMillion

3 points

1 month ago

I can’t even imagine what is the appeal of these places.

NeverBeenToCincy

3 points

1 month ago

It’s not what I wish it was. The women do not look like women I would know in real life, for better or worse, so it’s detached from my sexual fantasies in a weird way.

I wish strip clubs had normal women, or actual amateur nights where girlfriends and wives could live out their fantasies.

All that being said, I have no animosity towards strippers because everyone has to make a living and they know their industry better than I do.

zogins

6 points

1 month ago

zogins

6 points

1 month ago

Gentleman’s clubs in my country mean a place where there is a bar full of beautiful girls. They hit on you and 'make you' buy them drinks then they lure you to get a lap dance. It is done in private and is very erotic but you are not allowed to touch them. It is all super expensive.

Once I went to one such place and as I sat at the bar this AMAZINGLY beautiful woman dressed in almost nothing came up to me. She touched me lightly and asked me to buy her a drink. I asked her what she wanted and she wanted champagne. I told her firmly that I was having gin and she could have what I was having. She agreed and the barman got us both a drink. She put hers down and asked for another. I asked her to finish the one I had just bought her first. At that point she left.

I thought to myself that since she had not touched her drink I would drink it myself. I was very surprised to find that it was water.

trey74

5 points

1 month ago

trey74

5 points

1 month ago

I think they are not for me. I have been to a couple, years ago.

Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

2 points

1 month ago

Lost interest when I found out they weren’t all covers for covert intelligence agencies like the Diogenes Club

wbrd

2 points

1 month ago

wbrd

Male >40

2 points

1 month ago

I've been to a few, and I've lived in a place where there was lots of amateur flashing in bars. They're mostly boring. It's more entertaining to watch the sheltered businessmen see their first titty in the wild than it is to watch a dancer take her clothes off.

mexploder89

2 points

1 month ago

mexploder89

Male

2 points

1 month ago

I have nothing against their existence or against the girls, but I hate being in them. I went to Amsterdam and passed through the Red Light district and honestly didn't enjoy it at all, I just wanted to leave. I don't like strip clubs (never been, don't really want to). I'm not a prude or anything, but it just feels wrong to me how these girls are transactioning their attention for my money. Not my thing

hunky_pilot

2 points

1 month ago

hunky_pilot

25M, married

2 points

1 month ago

I’ve never been to one, and I’m perfectly content with that. They just seem kinda sketchy, and I feel like it’s kinda weird that some guys waste money trying to buy the affection of strippers. Plus, I have a lovely wife at home who I can see naked for free!

Dordykackmechav

2 points

1 month ago

Unless there's big old comfy chairs, a roaring fire, pints of port and bowls of cocaine. It's not for me.

va_texan

2 points

1 month ago

Personally I get nothing out of them, find them disgusting, and feel sorry for the girls. I think it's weird being at a strip club with friends knowing that my buddy next to me probably has a raging hard-on.

hypedstoic

2 points

1 month ago

hypedstoic

dude from the '80s

2 points

1 month ago

Like as in strip club or as the local hangout for where old money geezers and local politicians can come to informal agreements in regards to their businesses while drinking expensive scotch?

Not my thing really in either way. The only time it was genuinely fun going to a strip club was when a girl I dated convinced me that we should both go, because it turned her on more than me.

jarrellcperrin

2 points

1 month ago

Lots of them have great lunches, especially for the money.

TheDevilsAdvokaat

2 points

1 month ago

No interest at all. I'm the right age (nearly 60) but it seems like a very outdated idea.

I actually prefer the company of women to the company of men.

HBK05

2 points

1 month ago

HBK05

2 points

1 month ago

This post is talking about titty bars..strip clubs.

TheDevilsAdvokaat

2 points

1 month ago

Whoops. I thought they meant actual clubs for Gentlemen....they still exist in my city (although they're pretty rare now) and

WhatsUrBestMilkshake

2 points

1 month ago

Strip clubs are a waste of money in my opinion

PickleInDaButt

2 points

1 month ago

The least giving a fuck about rules strip club i have ever been to was absolutely Memphis.

Kripposoft

2 points

1 month ago

Kripposoft

Bane

2 points

1 month ago

It's like going to a dolphin show: You want to enjoy it but just end up feeling sad for them.

erdtirdmans

2 points

1 month ago

erdtirdmans

Male

2 points

1 month ago

For like a Bachelor party when you're rolling with a crowd of chill dudes and a good chunk of change, you can have a really fun night. Outside of those really special occasions, why the fuck are you even going?

Gryffon_Atarangi

2 points

1 month ago

Old gentleman's clubs where you got a cool place and share cigars? Awesome! Strip clubs? I avoid them like the plague. This might be a weird way of putting this, but you don't go to look at pictures of food when you're hungry. I'm not saying go out and pay for sex, but why make it worse for yourself?

Hessian58N

2 points

1 month ago

Waste of money. Go get drinks, shoot some pool, but throwing money at a girl who will show you her butthole but won't tell you her real name is pathetic. They'll do a lapdance for 10 minutes and it'll cost you two hours worth of work... And you won't be taking them home.

Spend your money having fun, doing something you wouldn't be embarrassed to tell your friends and family about.

Poopsi808

7 points

1 month ago

They’re the epitome of trashiness. I feel bad for the women there and disgusted by the men.

Kareem_Pie

3 points

1 month ago

Waste of money. It’s like going to a nice buffet and not being able to eat. I never understood them.

KermitAfc

3 points

1 month ago

That the name is almost always oxymoronic.

beardedgamerdad

1 points

1 month ago

Strip clubs? They're meh. Pretty indifferent to their existence.

danny_welds

1 points

1 month ago

Money better spent elsewhere.

FirstAdministration

1 points

1 month ago

For best answer go to r/ExpectationVsReality.

Mortei

1 points

1 month ago

Mortei

1 points

1 month ago

There's a couple near my college campus. And without even wondering whether or not I'd go to one, all I have to do is look at where it's situated: next to a dump and a strip mall that is barely getting by.

amnesia92

1 points

1 month ago

Overpriced and overrated, haven't stepped foot in one in over ten years. Probably never will again either.

NauticalPhoenix

1 points

1 month ago

Fun if you have money to blow.

Dawg1001

1 points

1 month ago

When I was younger it was one those things that sounded fun, until I got to to the club and then I didn’t care for the scene very much. I never go now.

WriteSomethingGood

1 points

1 month ago

Never understood the fascination. Who thought up the idea of "hey guys, let's all go into a dimly lit club and look at buck naked women with each other"..?

I prefer my buck naked women in the comfort of my own home, ta.

TETO, but not for me...

wutsgudbaby

1 points

1 month ago

I'm not a fan.

Went once with my wife and some mutual friends. I've never felt so uncomfortable in my life. It's not for me, never will be.

ToyVaren

1 points

1 month ago

Ripoff, terrible return vs $ spent, slightly prettier girls than other options, no quality in drinks.

The only reason i went was because they let me drink at 17.

BasicTelevision5

1 points

1 month ago

I’ve been to them and had a good time, but would only go in the context of a bachelor party, etc. More than anything else, I’m too frugal to spend the money.

thegroovemonkey

2 points

1 month ago

It's only rare occasions for me like a bachelor party. My fantasy football commish and I went and spent my prize money one year when I won. I try to avoid them, usually have fun when I'm there, and regret it the second that I leave.

BasicTelevision5

1 points

1 month ago

Maybe it’s age speaking, but I can’t get past all the other things I could spend the money on!

DreadChylde

1 points

1 month ago

DreadChylde

Male

1 points

1 month ago

When I was in college, there was one of these establishments very close by. They had free entry for students and two draft beers for 20 DKK (something 3.50 or 4.00 USD) from opening time at 8 o'clock until 10.

We all went there since it was basically the CHEAPEST place to drink in town. You had to wear a suit with shirt and tie, and the female guests had to wear a dress of modest length. It was the weirdest thing when a girl with fake boobs almost spilling out of her string bra and a matching thong, would turn one of our fellow students away for being indecently dressed.

It was a fun place and we got to know all the bartenders and servers during the six years through bachelor and later master. Have never been back since but my memories are positive.

Odd-Rest-1778

1 points

1 month ago

I see nothing wrong with them as long as you are realistic with your expectations. I like going to them but you won't catch me out back in the 'champagne' rooms. The clubs really helped my shyness and awkwardness in talking with attractive women. You get the right club where the girls actually enjoy their job you'll find that they don't mind sitting and chatting with you. You just always need to remember they are there to earn a living so don't get offended if they eventually move on to another gentleman.

DreamBigWakeUp

1 points

1 month ago

Only been to a couple, UK and Germany. One in UK was fine, actually we stood and spoke to the girls for about an hour and had a couple of drinks with them, got a dance and left. Was just a starting point. Germany we went in the place, about three girls working, rest of them were guys who we thought were ready to rob us. We got taken to a room, drinks weren’t allowed in so had to leave them on table. Got a dance, left and I noticed my bottle had moved from the way I left the label facing. Told everyone in our group to not drink and left straight away.

So one good, and one bad experience. But UK club were normal girls, so be nice to them, treat them with respect. At the end of the day they are doing a job, but with titties out.

TheDarkKnight1035

1 points

1 month ago

Waste of money for me personally, but fine with them in general.

GeriatricZergling

1 points

1 month ago

I have never seen a "gentleman's club" that didn't look like you'd have a >20% chance of being murdered and/or having your kidneys stolen if you went in. Avoided at all costs.

DeadliftsnDonuts

1 points

1 month ago

When I was younger and unaware it was great. I’m in Houston which is or was the strip club capital of the world. Sex acts were not uncommon at most clubs. At Treasures patrons would form forts made out of chairs. Most of the women spoke little English.

As I became aware of sex trafficking the idea of strip clubs being fun was over. I have friends who were strippers and obviously they weren’t trafficked or pimped. But a lot of the girls there are.

SamLJacksonNarrator

1 points

1 month ago

Treasures was amazing for me back in 09.

scottb80

1 points

1 month ago

Fun but expensive.

paladin_slim

1 points

1 month ago

I've not been to one since 2019. But yeah there is a certain sadness and desperation to those kinds of clubs that comes when your browser is overflowing with tabs, you've not gotten anyone to swipe right, and you're starved for physical contact with a woman. They fill that need, even if it's shallow and lacking in all intimacy.

Stony0604

1 points

1 month ago

Fun when your young, now it's just like "meh" same thing as last time

DiogoSN

1 points

1 month ago

DiogoSN

1 points

1 month ago

Fucking stuck up assholes who think they're high and mighty.

helpnxt

1 points

1 month ago

helpnxt

Male

1 points

1 month ago

Been to a proper Gentlemens club twice (like the posh places that are basically hotels) and as mentioned its a fancy hotel essentially but the one in Edinburgh had the BEST scramble eggs I've ever eaten but it did allow me and a couple family members get to attend the Fringe festival a few years ago even though all the normal hotels were fully booked

In comparison I've never been to a strip club

FBM_ent

1 points

1 month ago

FBM_ent

1 points

1 month ago

If you work nights or stay out late t's the only place to drink after 2AM when the bars close

thestonerd777

1 points

1 month ago

Never been, don’t wanna go. Seems super awkward and sleazy

BlackRider266

1 points

1 month ago

Personally, not a fan. Nothing against those that work in or attend, but for me, that's a lot of money to be sexually turned on to no end result, you know?

ExitTheHandbasket

1 points

1 month ago

Not my thing.

In a major Texas metro area there was a strip club named for a hedonist Roman emperor.

The common wisdom was that the bouncers asked if you were armed, and if you weren't they'd give you a weapon because you were likely to need it at some point.

The owner was known to be mobbed up. The club burnt to the ground under mysterious circumstances a few years ago.

MApitstop

1 points

1 month ago

It's like putting a steak in front of a starving man. But hes not allowed to touch or eat it!

Adlersch

1 points

1 month ago

I went on a road trip with friends once, and one of our stops was a strip club. It wasn't very fun.

I had two watered down drinks (I actually thought the "watered down" thing was a meme before this) before I got bored and went to the car to sleep. I didn't wanna waste money on a dance or anything, and my friends didn't wanna leave.

I didn't miss the most exciting part of the night though, where a drunk college kid spilled his drink on a dancer and the bouncer physically threw him out of the club.

Thought that was a meme too. Anyways, two hours later my friends come back to the car, one having spent $300 or so and the other having wasted over $700.

callothumpian

1 points

1 month ago

Only way some men will see anl real life axe wound in today's day and age.

MyDarkWish

1 points

1 month ago

I was the dude who was in a relationship for years before even thinking about going. After my relationship ended and I was bored I figured what the hell. I expected nonstop boobs and constant flirting. My views of the club changed when I saw a dancer literally shrug her shoulders and sit on the stage while nobody paid her any attention. Poor girl.

EliteDeerHunter

1 points

1 month ago

I hate strip clubs to the point that if I'm forced to be in them, I damn near get a panic attack.

YMarkY2

1 points

1 month ago

YMarkY2

1 points

1 month ago

How is somebody "forced" to be in a strup club?

EliteDeerHunter

1 points

1 month ago

How is somebody “forced” to go to their in-laws?

GenXEndBot

1 points

1 month ago

What's a gentleman's club

drlove57

1 points

1 month ago

drlove57

Male

1 points

1 month ago

They're a novelty for awhile but after that it gets boring. Even with a lapdance it's mostly look but don't touch. And with exceptons it's not like you really want to date anyone in that world unless you're looking for an escort.

a_middle_aged_nudist

1 points

1 month ago

Not something I understand the appeal of.

MightyGoodra96

1 points

1 month ago

I remember saying to other dudes I don't want to pay for shit I could get for free, and that it'd just be weird deliberately getting a hard on around a bunch of dudes.

Needless to say my sexuality was challenged and I was called 'weird'

moleindaground

1 points

1 month ago

A cringey waste of time and money. Will never go to a strip club, ever. What’s the point?

McTrentonomous

1 points

1 month ago

Never been to one, not my shit

Rktdebil

1 points

1 month ago

Rktdebil

A very manly Polish

1 points

1 month ago

Never been to one, don’t care to visit

PaanBren

1 points

1 month ago

One of those things you outgrow as you get older. By mid-late 20s I had no desire. The only older guys in there you see are usually straight up losers.

Grany_Bangr

1 points

1 month ago

I was bored shitless. The drink tasted like it was watered down & I had more fun talking to the bar staff. 100% wont be back in one.

mattbrianjess

1 points

1 month ago

Assuming you mean strip clubs.

Much like anything else, when the women working/managing have a say/ownership stake it’s a safer cleaner more professional more fun environment. The strippers seem like they are in control, make good money, and aren’t forced into “extras”. These places are a blast and a great place to have a party.

When it’s the opposite it’s easy to tell. The girls seem to young and under pressure to do whatever the clients want. Dark dirty dangerous. Get the fuck out of that place.

rorank

1 points

1 month ago

rorank

1 points

1 month ago

Not really for me, but I respect it. Women who go up there sometimes really need it, sometimes are making more than the people tipping. And the men who go there probably need it. I don’t think it’s unethical in itself. Just not for me.

redvodkandpinkgin

1 points

1 month ago

I have no idea what you're talking about, but seeing the comments imma just assume you mean either strip clubs or actual brothels. Both are disgusting and have their business model based around objectifying whoever is the product (usually women, sometimes gay men)

No_cats_in_hell

1 points

1 month ago

If you mean strip clubs, meh, once you've seen one you've seen them all. I went twice and just found it really weird. Some dudes love it. Some of the ladies look like they are having genuine fun working there, many just look like they're working a job . It's not really my thing.

If you mean men's only clubs like sports clubs or stuff like that, it's kinda nice to sometimes have gendered gatherings. Like a men's billiards league or rowing or like a dinner club and such like that. So long as dudes don't get all weird like that one up manship mentality or displaying hatred for others. I'm not into that. But I do like to just hang out with other guys sometimes without women present.

POGtastic

1 points

1 month ago

POGtastic

1 points

1 month ago

They're just sleazy. I get that the sleaziness is part of the appeal for some people, but it's not for me. They're also rife with exploitation, and a gigantic amount of patrons are such sad sacks of shit that it feels like I'm tainted by association.

If I wanted to throw a bunch of money away and not get laid, I'd take my wife out to a nice dinner and mock her mother until she got mad at me. It'd be cheaper and be better for our marriage.

acdcfanbill

1 points

1 month ago

acdcfanbill

1 points

1 month ago

I don't like them and don't visit them, but I'm not mad they exist or anything. I'd much rather have legalized, regulated, and properly taxed vice, no matter if I'm interested in that particular type or not.

Andrenachrome

1 points

1 month ago

It's all bullshit.

For the men, it's either a lads night out. Which is fine in and of itself. Or its a dude who is really lonely being honest about it or thinking there is a woman there that actually likes him.

For female dancers they lie to themselves that it's some empowering schtick when its really that they go through some deep trauma, or they are addicts/trafficked. The shit about being smart with money is typically bullshit, much like the dude who goes to sit quietly and enjoy nudes. It's such an outlier for that to occur.

Having had roommates that are strippers, hung out with bikers where their club deals out of these places, you have to be an idiot to think that guys are there just for a laugh and there is the mythical unicorn woman looking for her soulmate wearing lingerie in a public space full of men.

The_Veteran_Raven

1 points

1 month ago

Personally, the last thing I wanna do when horny is go pay a significant sum to see some tits (and sometimes vulva), all without having the ability to rub one out. But, yeah, whatever boats your float, as long as the women are cool with it.

BerserkBoulderer

1 points

1 month ago

I can see why rich people want to network with each other but the actual entertainment aspect of a club doesn't appeal to me.

lusciouslou91

1 points

1 month ago

No interest in going, but don't care if others do.

FoulMouthedBastard

1 points

1 month ago

Not interested, do not see the appeal and I usually feel more comfortable and welcome in mixed spaces.

chocjames43

1 points

1 month ago

It's a great time with the right mindset. Going with your buddies and doing shots and throwing bills at the bar altogether is as fun as it looks on tv.

Going with friends, but then breaking off to get lapdances on your own and physically frustrating yourself for more money than a prostitute is a awful as it sounds here on reddit.

Live-Taco

1 points

1 month ago

Sounds great.

HeroicMillipede

1 points

1 month ago

It depends on why you go. I went once with a friend, it got me perfectly in the mood and then I called a fwb I had and it made for an epic night. It gives a different experience than just having sex, it creates build up and anticipation. Its also a social setting where you can hang out with friends and have a few drinks if you're comfortable enough. I don't mind them, its intimacy beyond sex despite them being sexual in nature, and depending on the quality of the place, it may or may not have very attractive women.

JeepNaked

1 points

1 month ago

JeepNaked

Dude

1 points

1 month ago

I always enjoyed them. I had a thing for strippers before I got married, so I hung out in a lot of clubs because I was hanging out with the dancers.

Strippers in general check a lot of my boxes. I kinda miss those times.

Frigoris13

1 points

1 month ago

Honestly, they're just sad. I feel bad for the girls that work there everytime. I know some want to work there but it's all fake. They don't know me, I don't know them but they show me stuff to get my money. They're sweaty and covered in perfume to hide their BO and covered in glitter. It's just a weird situation and not really all that fun considering how much money you lose

ChloePrice4Life

1 points

1 month ago

I only ever have a good time at them when I'm with a girlfriend or date. Going as a single dude is just a tease and having the women pretend to like you and ask if you want a dance is annoying. When you're with a woman, the dancers will usually just come over and casually hang out with you and just bullshit, or even talk shit about other customers and shit which is a cool bonus.

oktnt1

1 points

1 month ago

oktnt1

1 points

1 month ago

Just nasty only the low of the low are seen at these places

DocHickory

1 points

1 month ago

To begin with, the name 'gentleman's club' is a misnomer. It would be rare for a gentleman to be seen inside of one. What these places do, for the most part, is legal. Men, being visual creatures, get to ogle what men usually ogle. Women who work at these 'clubs' are using their natural (and sometimes enhanced) endowments to extract money from the gullible. The only love to be seen is the love of moolah, the long green, cash money. When the money stops flowing romance dies an ugly death. It's an industry based on a scam. At best they are a form of entertainment, a place to appreciate the human form in all its glory. At worst they are a breeding ground for criminal activity (drugs, prostitution, human trafficing, robbery, etc). Is there a demand for what they provide? Yes. Will someone always find a way to provide what there is a demand for? Yes. Girls sometimes work at these places to pay for their higher education. Others work there to finance their own or SO's drug habit. Is one noble and the other despicable? Perhaps so, but they will continue to exist as a reflection of the society of the time.

dakotathunder97

1 points

1 month ago

Just a big waste of money in my opinion. And a sobering reminder of how touch starved I really am. Haven't been to one since I got out of the military years ago

glazerspoon

1 points

1 month ago

Fucking love the rippers, go there after a club or party to wind down for the night, nice calm talk with friends, sometimes even forget that someone is stripping right in front of me

(I've only been to Canadian strip clubs)

NoSelfEsteemGuys

1 points

1 month ago

Cannot fathom why some guys go there. You ever smelled one? It's pungent.

twalther

1 points

1 month ago

I've been to a few. Never saw a gentleman in there.

Voltage_56

1 points

1 month ago

Pointless. Why would I want to go somewhere and pay to see an exotic dancer when I can stay home go online for free and find something that appeals to me drink as much as I want without getting cut off and be able to please myself without getting fines or embarrassed?

Fullscan19

1 points

1 month ago

Not for me

AngelStickman

1 points

1 month ago

“Meh” I’m just not interested. It may have some part to do with being a tactile rather than visual person. The thought of paying to see someone just isn’t appealing. I’d rather a more quality interaction.

1-Down

1 points

1 month ago

1-Down

1 points

1 month ago

Don't like them. My friends who have liked them like them a little too much for their own good.

xMCioffi1986x

1 points

1 month ago

Strip clubs? Never had much of an interest in them.

Mop3103

1 points

1 month ago

Mop3103

Male

1 points

1 month ago

Never visited one but I guess they're fine only if the girls are there by their own will and they are legal

MidDayGamer

1 points

1 month ago

Haven't been to one in a long time, waste of cash.

HanzoHattoti

1 points

1 month ago

The original gentlemen’s clubs were safe space for men to hang out without the Mrs and the servants to be nosey. Most marriages at the time were arranged so most wives were “difficult” to say the least.

Significant difference with Indian and Chinese culture where dogma and custom rule every aspect. Ironically the whorehouse was where Chinese men of middle/upper class gathered.

Cooler67

1 points

1 month ago

I feel like I wouldn't really have a good time unless I went to a club in say Montréal although that might just have a creepy vibe about it.